Hello there! I am Warisha Ejaz and I am back. I will write my blogs without any formal introductions. I will start up as if you and I are good friends and write as casually as possible. So, here we go.
Honestly, there are times when we feel utterly lost.. when the most confident, extroverted felt insecure and panicked when they had a chance to shine. When they knew that they had to present something, they were buzzing with energy and were ready to take on the scene. But, what happened suddenly? Why did they feel out when they entered the room full of professional high-rank people.. people who were students, teachers, heads..why did this happen? Why did they feel the need to close up in a tight space... and when they did, relief washed over... Why did it happen? And even when the day ended, the feeling did not... Why do they seem to be stuck with the feeling? Why did their mind feel cloudy? Why did they feel... something they should not? Something crazy? And why are they struggling to hide it because it is only going to end up in confrontation... Confrontation they do not want to go through.. questions they do not want to answer, because, in reality, they do not know the answers themselves. They want to and do not want to know the answers themselves... It is all so complicated, isn't it?
I feel the lyrics of a song, which I will translate here for my foreign readers.
Sukoon ~ Hassan and Roshan, Shae Gill.
Our high standards have what made us really lost. The sun exists in the sky no matter how many clouds hide it! Similarly, hope exists no matter how many ups and downs of life, no matter how many lost feelings are there. I am not saying that what we feel is nothing. In fact, it is nothing at all. It matters... it matters a lot.
It might feel that you have long ago disconnected from the person you were in the past. It might feel like your old self was better. It might feel like you in the past were way better and more content than now and you might feel like missing your old you. Your past self might feel like a lost loved one. You miss them, you cry for them, and you might make yourself feel hope that there is a slight chance of you coming back to you when you well know that there is not.. not at all. You know well that old self this present self is lost and you keep on living like a nobody, you know it is wrong, but it is weirdly comforting and comfort wins over correctness.
Honestly, I felt this way. In fact, I still feel this way, and the most unsettling part is that I still do not know what to do. I do not want to harm myself, so whenever I feel like this, I go to a place where I can be alone... and I cry... I cry like real, real bad. As a backup, when I cannot do this such as when I am in a gathering, I start writing what I feel. Better yet, I go up suddenly to a trusted person like my mother, or my cousin's best friend or my school friend, or my school coordinator who is a mother for me, and I simply... hug them. And it feels so comforting.
Honestly, accepting the fact that you are sometimes lost and welcoming the feeling by channeling your emotions toward the present helps a lot. What I write might seem complicated in words but by emotions is not. In terms of simplicity, we just need to accept the feeling that we are not okay and feel what our mind tells us to. If it tells us to cry, we need to cry, if it tells us to separate from people, we gotta do it, because our mind is special.
You may be thinking how do we know what our mind tells us, it is very simple. Close your eyes, and do the first thing that comes to your mind. It might feel very crazy but trust me, it works. In our daily busy lives, we ignore ourselves so much that our mind pulls us into loneliness to attract attention. So why don't we give it the attention it needs before it gains it the wrong way?
I feel like that right now the article is becoming a bit too long and it might be boring and overwhelming. So I am going to wrap it up by just writing a quote from the book "Music, Silence, and Noise" by Muhammad Saad Riaz, the book that actually stimulated me to write about this feeling:-
"There is music, silence, and noise still trapped inside their tender minds. And together, they can create splendid music."
Stay safe, happy, happy, and happy Y'all!!!
See you gals again soon!!
Love y'all, Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!
I think everyone relates to this article somehow. Very well done warisha.👍👍👍
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